When Doctors Were Family: A Look Back

I would venture to say that more has changed in the last fifty years than at any previous time in human history. Technology has evolved so much, especially in the last twenty years. If they were able to come back and visit today, I do not believe the world would be completely recognizable to generations past . True there has been a lot of good that has come from technology. At the same time though, it seems that a lot of the good of the past has disappeared. I’m especially thinking today about the times when doctors were family.

Small Town Values

When I was born, at the beginning of the 1980’s, my hometown of Papillion, Nebraska was still a very small town. Then just a small town southwest of the Omaha, Nebraska Metro area. Today, Papillion has now grown into a bustling, vibrant, big suburb of Omaha. In the 1980’s though it had a population of just over 4,000 people and the main routes to get out of town were still gravel roads. A typical small town, a couple of bars, a few churches, a Dairy Queen. My Grandpa ran the local small town grocery store and butcher shop and my Grandma was a nurse in the local medical clinic.

When my Grandparents had first settled in Papillion in the early 1960’s, there had not been any medical services at all in town. Anyone needing medical services, even for a sniffle or a cough, had to make the trek into Omaha. By today’s standards not a big deal. Cars were not the same then though and life in general moved at a slower pace. The twenty to thirty minute drive to Omaha seemed like a lifetime back then. Especially when a good portion of the trip was travelling gravel roads. For some years my Grandma commuted into Omaha every day to work as a surgical nurse. Although she loved her job the long hours and time commuting took its toll on her and her family.

Solving Problems Over The Butcher Counter

For its entire existence, my Grandpa’s butcher shop was the focal point of town meetings and gossip. Yes, there were still official City Council meetings and School Board meetings. For all intents and purposes though, business was finalized around the butcher counter at the Golden Rule. In the early sixties, one of the continual concerns that arose was the need for Papillion to have a doctor. Would Barney (my Grandpa), talk to Helen (my Grandma) about getting a doctor for Papillion? The idea then being that she would be the town nurse.

Rising To The Occasion

If they were nothing else, Barney and Helen were doers. When they saw a need, whether it be in their family or in the community, they found a way to see it fulfilled. Helen had contacts at the hospital in Omaha, she made some inquiries. Within a short time she found a doctor who would commit to opening a new practice. Papillion now had a hometown doctor and nurse. Coughs, colds, and broken bones could now be fixed without leaving town.

A little more than a decade passed and Papillion had grown by a couple of thousand people. Over coffee and donuts at the Golden Rule a new concern was brought forth. Why doesn’t Papillion have its own hospital and more advanced medical practice? Once again Barney and Helen rose to the occasion. Petitioning, fundraising, and recruiting, they worked tirelessly to bring more advanced medical capabilities to the town they had grown to love. The town they were proud to call home.

Answering The Call

As the word got out that Papillion was in need of doctors, two very special doctors, a husband and a wife answered the call. Drs. Thomas and Barbara Heywood saw this as a perfect opportunity to go into practice together. For Papillion this meant getting two of the finest Ear, Nose and Throat doctors which were available anywhere. More than this though, Barney and Helen gained friends for a lifetime. No, more than friends, these doctors were family. Drs. Tom and Barb, along with their daughter Angie, quickly became regular guests at the Shives house.

When Doctors Were Family

By the time I was born, the friendship had been well solidified. I cannot recall too many occasions in my early life in which the Heywood’s weren’t part of our celebrations. It was not unusual at all to celebrate with them on a Sunday night and then be seen by one or the other doctor in clinic for an ear infection or runny nose later that week. For several years into my life, I didn’t know that it wasn’t “normal” to celebrate Christmas, Easter or Birthdays with your doctors. Not only this, but I was accustomed to being spoiled by all of the other nurses and medical staff because I was Barney and Helen’s grandson.

For me though there’s more than the personal relationship that I had become accustomed to with the Heywood family. I personally owe my life, as I know it now, to Dr. Tom’s medical expertise. I had been born severely tongue tied. By the time I was three years old it was immensely affecting my ability to speak intelligibly and swallow safely. Through a complex surgery of removing the tongue tie and rerouting a series of glands, Dr. Tom gave me the opportunity to achieve a level of normalcy. Normalcy which I may not have been able to have with a less skilled surgeon. Yes, it took several additional years of intensive speech language pathology. All of the speech therapy in the world would have been useless though, had it not been for Dr. Tom’s intervention.

A Real Life Hero

Less than two years after this major surgery, my parents rushed me to the emergency room, I was blue. Suffering from a severe case of epiglottitis, I was struggling to breathe and needed immediate intervention. Whether Dr. Tom was called or whether he was already at the hospital I don’t recall. Either way it seemed that he was in my ER room within a matter of seconds. As my Grandpa Barney liked to relay the story, I was turning blue and Dr. Tom came out ghost white after seeing me. Not that any doctor likes to see any of their patients hinging on the verge of life and death, but I have always had a feeling that for Dr. Tom I was an extra special case. I was a kid, I was Barney and Helen’s grandson, for him, as a doctor, I was like family.

The normal protocols for the severity of epiglottitis that I had would be to intubate and remove the epiglottis. Removing the epiglottis though, most likely would have required the permanent placement of a tracheostomy and a feeding tube. I had no idea about any of this at the time obviously. Fortunately, Dr. Tom was not your average doctor. He had foresight, he had patience, he had faith. He opted for the conservative treatment of putting me in a hyperbaric oxygen tent. An attempt to see if the epiglottal swelling would go down. His patience, faith and prayers worked.

So Thankful…

After several days of hospitalization I was able to go home no differently and basically no worse for the wear. Obviously if the epiglottis would have had to be removed he would have done it. He would have also placed a tracheostomy and feeding tube with extreme surgical care. Nevertheless, I am eternally grateful to him for his medical faith. A permanent tracheostomy and feeding tube at four years old would have changed the complete course of my life.

Friends Forever

As I continued to grow, Drs. Tom and Barb were always there for me and our family. Through countless ear aches, runny noses and everything in between, we could always count on the Heywood’s. They came to our anniversaries, graduations and marriages and we went to all of theirs. As my brothers and I have matriculated into middle age the Heywood’s have continued to keep in touch, even though they have retired and moved out of state. Likewise our family has tried to keep in touch with them and their daughter Angie’s beautiful family.

When I was critically ill with Covid three years ago, again verging on the brink of death, the good Doctors kept in close contact with my Mom. Inquiring as to what doctors were treating me and what methods were being used. After having practiced in the Omaha area for so many years they had contacts and were willing to make referrals for whatever services I may have needed. Not just doctors but truly family. Going above and beyond even when they didn’t have too. That’s just the type of people they are, not just doctors, but like family.

May He Rest In Peace and Rise In Glory

Dr. Tom passed away a week ago after a battle with esophageal cancer. Since they moved from Nebraska to Texas I hadn’t seen them for several years. I don’t believe I ever told him in person how grateful I am for everything he did for me. I hope he knows. I hope that we all get to the glory of Heaven some day and I hope that Barney and Helen have a kitchen there, because I know Dr. Tom will be sitting there regaling us with his stories and laughter. He was one of the finest physicians I have ever known, I pray that the Divine Physician is now caring eternally for him. Because for the Eternal Doctor, Dr. Tom is family.

In your charity please pray for the repose of the soul of Dr. Tom Heywood. May his soul and the souls of all the faithful departed rest in peace and may light perpetual shine upon them, Amen.